Feast of the Holy Family
By Fr. Victor Feltes
The Holy Family went up to Jerusalem each year for the feast of Passover. Once, when Jesus was twelve years old, as they were leaving the city at the end of the festival, the Boy Jesus stayed behind without his parents knowing it. Whole communities would pilgrimage to and from these feasts together, so Joseph and Mary had assumed Jesus was walking with others in the caravan during that first day journeying on the road back to Nazareth. But then, perhaps when it was time to share a meal or set up camp for the evening, his parents could not find him. They would have asked all of their relatives and neighbors about the last place they had seen the boy and realized that he had not been with them for hours. Joseph and Mary would soon return to Jerusalem and find Jesus alive and well on the third day. In this difficult episode for the Holy Family, there are lessons for us today.
Jesus had the best parents in all of human history. His adoptive father was a great saint and his mother was filled with grace. And yet, one time, they lost track of their only child for three days. This shows us that sometimes we can try our hardest and things will still go wrong (at least in our own eyes). We can always choose to put forth our best effort, but we cannot control every outcome. Remember: Just because something goes wrong, even painfully wrong, does not necessarily mean that we have sinned. The Blessed Mother was sinless and yet she lost her Son.
When we are little, our parents might seem perfect. As we grow up, we are disappointed to see their imperfections. But as we advance in wisdom and age becoming adults ourselves, we better understand human weakness and limitations. This does not erase people’s flaws and sometimes grave faults, but it can help us have more mercy for people, including forgiving our parents and ourselves.
After three days, Joseph and Mary found Jesus in the temple, “sitting in the midst of the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions.” Jesus shows us that we can learn things even from imperfect people. Jesus’ parents were astonished when they found him, and his mother said to him, “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.” Like holy figures in the Old Testament before her, Mary questions the Lord about the things she does not understand.
Being twelve years old, Jesus was years beyond the age of reason. He must have known his parents would be concerned after he concealed his plans from them. But the Sinless One does not offer an apology. Instead, he asks them, “Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” It is a mystery why it was God’s will for Jesus to remain in Jerusalem. Even after his reply, his parents did not understand what he said to them. But he returned home with them to Nazareth and was obedient to them as he advanced in wisdom and age and favor before God and man. Blessed Mother Mary kept this episode in her memory, remembering its stressful beginning and joyful end, and pondering its meaning in her heart.
The things which happen in our lives, like the circumstances of our upbringing or the crises that come our way, will not always make sense to us. But we can learn and grow from all these things, and become more holy families because of them, for “God works all things for the good of those who love him.”













