Archive for the ‘Wedding Homilies’ Category

The Bridegroom — The Noah Cahak & Antoinette Sonnentag Wedding

August 10, 2026

By Fr. Victor Feltes

When I went to seminary in preparation for the priesthood, they had us study philosophy before studying theology. One reason for this was so we could better understand how people have thought in the past and present and might more effectively proclaim Christian truths today. This homily will begin more philosophically than usual, but its purpose is to lead toward the truths of Christ.

In our first reading from the Book of Tobit, we hear Tobiah praying with his wife on their wedding night. He says, “Blessed are you, O God of our ancestors… Let the heavens and all your creation bless you forever. You made Adam, and you made his wife Eve to be his helper and support; and from these two the human race has come. You said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone; let us make him a helper like himself.’” Man and woman were made for each other. Both despite and because of our differences, men and women are drawn to each other in love and our natures complement each other. This is beautifully seen in the birth of children. Parents experience the gift of new children with wonder and joy. But a critic might dismiss all this.

“The instincts of warthogs and walruses attract them to their mates too, and female insects can hatch hundreds of offspring in a lifetime.” The critic might dismiss all human love and life as merely the results of natural laws with no divine designer necessary. A critic might look at our providential place within this complex universe and argue, “It’s no miracle that a puddle perfectly fills its pothole.” But why are nature’s laws the way they are rather than something else entirely? We can imagine alternate laws of nature for universes which would allow nothing interesting to exist. Why do we have fine-tuned natural laws which permit the marvelous things we see? And why is there anything rather than nothing? What is the explanation, the logic, the logos behind our universe?

In our second reading from the Letter to the Romans, we hear St. Paul exhorting Christians to act nobly. He says, “Offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God… Let love be sincere; hate what is evil, hold on to what is good; love one another with mutual affection…” These high moral callings accord with our consciences. Even in our human weakness, they resonate with the deep longings of our hearts. The critic might dismiss these human experiences too, seeing them as just more instincts bred by natural selection. But if right and wrong and our perceptions of value are nothing more than feelings, mere biases built into us by survival in an indifferent universe, why should we care or be ruled by those delusions? We long for true meaning, but if everything will end in death — you and me and everything — what difference does anything make in the long run? Are good, evil, and meaning real or just nothing more than “feels”? I believe the choice before us all is ultimately either belief in nothing (nihilism) or belief in Christ (Catholicism).

Not once upon a time, but in real history, the Creator entered his creation. The Author appeared inside his story as its Main Character. Entering time as man into the center of our history, Jesus Christ declares himself “the Bridegroom.” He comes to wed his Bride, the Church. In our Gospel, Jesus teaches how “from the beginning the Creator made them male and female” and said, “…the two shall become one flesh… So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, man must not separate.”

As the innocent New Adam, afflicted with thorns but naked without shame, Jesus’ obedience to God is tested at a tree. The Cross is the New Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil; however, if we eat from the Fruit of this tree, we can live forever. Eve was made for communion with God and Adam. The Church was made for communion with God and Christ. It is not good for mankind to be alone. Jesus Christ comes to reveal God’s truth and love for us anew, to reveal the reality of goodness and to conquer death. He calls you to seek and know him, to love and serve him, so that you are no longer two, but one flesh. And if you and Christ are already joined, this union you must not separate. Noah and Annie, remain in Christ, for only in him can you live and love in marriage as you ought. As St. John wrote: “God is love. Let us love one another, as God has loved us.”

Posted in Adam and Eve, Homily, Typology, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

Love & Eight — The Jacob Pake & Kayla Bowen Wedding

June 22, 2025

By Fr. Victor Feltes

We read in the Genesis Creation account that it was not good for mankind to live in solitude, so God made a suitable partner for the man. “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two become one body, one flesh.” Man and woman were made for each other. Psalm 128 notes how marriage, that first blessing from the original Garden, remains visible in the world even after the Fall: “Your wife like a fruitful vine in the heart of your house; your children like shoots of the olive around your table.” However, after the Fall, we are wounded by sin and drawn by temptation. Humanity commonly does not do as we should.

That is why St. Paul’s exhortation to the Corinthians reminds their divided and squabbling community what love is and what it is not. He lists eight things that love “is” or does alongside eight things love “is not.” Love is not jealous, not pompous, not inflated, not rude, not self-seeking, not quick-tempered, not brooding over injury, not rejoicing over wrongdoing. But love is patient, love is kind, it rejoices in the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things, and love never fails. These groupings of eight are interesting because Jesus in his Sermon on the Mount lists eight beatitudes. (Some may count nine beatitudes, but the Greek indicates that the final “blessed” is an expansion on the eighth one.) These beatitudes describe Christian saints, but first and foremost they describe Christ himself.

So eight, eight, and eight — What does this have to do with how we are to love today? In Genesis, God begins creating on the first day of the week, which is Sunday. He works six days and then rests on the seventh day. That is why the Jewish Sabbath, their holy day of rest, was Saturday. Jesus Christ, who on Good Friday worked his perfect Sacrifice, whose lifeless body on Holy Saturday kept a day of perfect rest, rose again on Easter Sunday. Christians beginning in the 1st or 2nd century called that Sunday “the eighth day,” the eighth day of Creation on which Jesus Christ transforms humanity and our lives in this world. Now we have hope beyond this life, hope for blessed endless life with God. And the Passion, Death, and Resurrection of Jesus have opened access to grace, the help of God, enabling us to live and love like him.

How can we achieve and preserve true unity and harmony among us in our homes and community? This is not possible merely on our own. We must let God give us his grace which allows us to live and love like him. This is why daily prayer, weekly worship, and consistent devotion to the Lord must be top priorities for any Christian. Jacob and Kayla, draw near to him and remain with him, so that you both may live and love like him and be blessed together. Like the psalmist said, ‘Blessed are all who fear, who reverence, the Lord and walk in his ways. You will be blessed and prosper. May you see your children’s children. May the Lord bless you all the days of your life.’

Posted in Creation, Homily, Love, Marriage and Family, Sermon on the Mount, Wedding Homilies | 1 Comment »

A City on a Mountain — The Garrett Mikula & Annabelle Wittrock Wedding

June 7, 2025

By Fr. Victor Feltes

“You are the salt of the earth…
  You are the light of the world.
  A city set on a mountain cannot be hidden.”

This is a classic Gospel reading. It encourages all Christians to be salt on this earth and light in this world in ways which cannot go entirely unnoticed. Yet in all my years, despite this reading being a valid option for weddings, I cannot recall it ever being selected. This got my mind wondering: “How is Christian marriage like a city set on a mountain?” How does Sacred Scripture connect mountains, cities, and marriage? Let’s look at three episodes.

In the 6th century B.C., the Prophet Daniel interpreted King Nebuchadnezzar’s secret dream which featured a huge statue representing ancient empires. A stone hewn from a mountain by God struck the statue, shattering it to pieces. Daniel foretells that the stone which struck the statue would become a great mountain, fill the whole earth, and stand forever.

Earlier, in the 8th century B.C., the Lord had declared through the Prophet Isaiah that he was “creating new heavens and a new earth.” “Indeed, I am creating Jerusalem to be a joy and its people to be a delight; I will rejoice in Jerusalem and exult in my people. … None shall harm or destroy on all my holy mountain….”

Finally, in the Book of Revelation, St. John describes his vision: “I saw a new heaven and a new earth… I also saw the holy city, a New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.” John hears a loud voice from God’s throne say, “Behold, God’s dwelling is with the human race. He will dwell with them and they will be his people and God himself will always be with them as their God.” Then John hears an angel say: “Come here. I will show you the bride, the wife of the Lamb.” Then the angel takes him in spirit to a great, high mountain and shows him the holy city Jerusalem coming down out of heaven from God.

So we see Sacred Scripture associating and connecting a holy mountain, a holy city (Jerusalem), and holy marriage. Now the Bible repeatedly calls God a Rock (“my Rock,” “our Rock,” an “eternal Rock”) and the city is identified as the Bride. God’s holy city appears to marry the earth upon the holy mountain.

In Ephesians 5, St. Paul gives instructions for husbands and wives: ‘Wives, follow your husbands. Husbands, sacrificially love your wives. The two shall become one flesh.’ And then St. Paul concludes, “This is a great mystery, but I speak in reference to Christ and the Church.” Bringing all of this together, I would suggest that the mountain and the city, Christ and the Church, you Garrett and Annabelle, are all (soon to be) joined in the same mystery. She, the city, relies on the mountain’s firm foundation, immovable core, quiet strength, loyal defense, strong support, provident resources, and enduring presence. And he, the mountain, delights in the city’s closeness, beauty, community, festivity, fruitfulness, joy, and laughter.

Garrett and Annabelle, your marriage is meant to share in this mystery. Behold, God’s dwelling is meant to be with the human race. So you must always allow Jesus Christ to be your Rock, the living Lord of your dwellings and daily lives. Only then will your marriage be salt for this earth and light to this world, a city set on a mountain which cannot be hidden.

Posted in Homily, Marriage and Family, Typology, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

‘Keep My Commandments & Love as I Love You’ — The Riley Henneman & Emily Holloway Wedding

September 11, 2023

By Deacon Dick Kostner

These words of Jesus in today’s gospel spell out a wedding gift to Riley and Emily that enables them to live out a life together of happiness not only in this life but also an eternal life with Jesus and the children of the creator of happiness, in the kingdom of God. To Riley and Emily, your Father in heaven tells you today, to listen to His Son and you will find eternal happiness.

These words of Jesus will not eliminate for you pain and suffering in this life but it will allow you endure the misfortunes that all human beings will encounter in an imperfect world. I have spent in my life many hours of prayer asking the Father to share with me his gift of wisdom, so today I will share my thoughts on what it means to follow the Eleventh Commandment Jesus gave us to “Love as I have loved you.”

Oh, it may seem like an easy task when you face each other today for you love one another and feel that you have found the “perfect” spouse to spend a lifetime with, but I must burst that bubble and share with you some wisdom and the fact is that there exists no human being that is “perfect.” To be human is to be imperfect. You might try and fool yourself into thinking you’re perfect, but time will prove you wrong. Trust me when I tell you that God programmed spouses to remind you that you are not perfect. All we have to do is look at our Bible readings and we will find that our first pope, St. Peter, thought he was perfect and would never turn against his friend, Jesus, but guess what happened; he was put to the test and failed not once but three times in saying he did not know Jesus.

We all have fears that we will encounter in life, such as job failures; broken friendships; illnesses; and yes that big one, deaths that we must experience and live through. How in the world can we love someone who hates us? Answer—Ask Jesus. How can we overcome the feeling we get when someone we love, does something to us that causes us to wonder if they really care about my feelings? Ask Jesus. How do we have love for a God that allows his only son to go through pain and suffering and yes even death without offering help? Ask Jesus. And how about the big one why would anyone be willing to surrender their life for someone that is not a friend or for someone who not only dislikes you but hates you? Ask Jesus.

Riley and Emily, I know you really enjoy hunting as I do. But I will share with you some wisdom that I discovered recently that made me appreciate animals more to the point that I enjoy watching them teach me how to love, more than I enjoy pursuing them in the field. Recently, I watched a program on Paramount entitled “1883” about early settlers making there way to Oregon to find a new life. On their way, they were confronted with a shortage of food and one of the travelers set out with his young son who was about ten years of age to hunt for some food. They came upon some deer and the father allowed and taught his son how to aim his rifle and acquire his first kill which was a nice buck. After the kill the father took some of the blood of the deer and smeared it on his sons face and told him that this deer gave up its life so that they might live so its important that hunters express their thanks to animals killed for providing us with food, by saying “thanks.” He then told his son to say “thanks” to the deer, which he did.

This stuck in my mind and I thought about how Jesus gave up his earthly life and his friends whom he loved, so that we might live and how that mirrors our directive from him to “Love as he has loved us.” It also opened my eyes to how all of God’s creation has that same vocation, to give of oneself so that someone or something else can live even if it means giving up your life. Some times this isn’t easy but its worth it to know that God has blessed you with a spouse. Riley and Emily, God has given you another set of hands, feet, heart, and mind to consult with and care for you when something breaks on you and you are hurting and who will lovingly remind you that you are not perfect when we get out of hand. I learned this first hand when I had my knees replaced and Barb babysat me.

I also would recommend that, as that young man in the episode did, to give thanks to your spouse for their gift to you of their lives. I would also encourage that you, as a couple, at least once each week to give thanks to Jesus by attending his Mass, receiving the Living Bread, and thanking him for giving up his life so that you two may live a life of happiness not only in this world but also Everlasting Life in the Kingdom of God. Giving thanks acknowledges are pledge to Jesus to love as he has loved us. Now let’s celebrate the “Love as I have loved you” Sacrament of Marriage, where Riley and Emily will pledge their love for one another and become one in being through the love of the Father.

Posted in Christian Perfection, Homily, Marriage and Family, Television, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

Fruitful Love Despite Our Flaws — The Justin Wachtendonk & Brenna Werner Wedding

July 8, 2023

By Fr. Victor Feltes

Justin and Brenna, you have chosen beautiful readings for your wedding Mass. Including your second reading, the most popular of all wedding reading options: St. Paul’s famous poetic hymn about love. In the 13th chapter of his 1st Letter to the Corinthians, St. Paul teaches what love does and does not do. These words contain blessed lessons for us all. Today, I wish to highlight the rarely-considered context of those passages to help married couples and people within Christ’s Church of our day.

When we think of the early Church, we tend to picture it as a golden age. The apostles were still alive on earth preaching the Gospel, performing miracles, and founding Christian communities. Divinely inspired books were still being written for what would become the New Testament of the Bible. The Church’s membership was growing widely and rapidly, while producing great saints and martyrs. But this does not mean that everything was perfect. Far from it!

You can see this in St. Paul’s 1st Letter to the Corinthians. He writes them to address the many things that were going wrong at the Church in Corinth. For instance, Paul corrects the Corinthian Christians’ bitter internal rivalries and factionalism. He notes the external scandal caused by them suing each other in secular courts. He critiques the Corinthians’ inflated pride. He excommunicates a certain man for his unrepentant sexual sins. He condemns the Church at Corinth’s liturgical abuses (against the Real Presence of Jesus and one another) at their celebrations of the Holy Eucharist. And St. Paul cites still more controversies than these. So things in the early Church were not so idyllic as we might imagine. And that can be a great encouragement for us today!

The early Church, despite the many flaws of her members, produced good, much good, world-transforming good and the salvation of many souls, in those days and thereafter. The Church today, despite the many flaws of her members, still produces much good, world-transforming good and the salvation of many souls. His Church build upon a rock is, as Jesus says in our Gospel, “a city set on a mountain which cannot be hidden.” She remains, “the salt of the earth” and “the light of the world” — purifying, enlightening, enhancing, and saving.

Whatever goodness is found in Christ’s Bride, the Church, is like the worthy wife the Book of Proverbs describes in our first reading. As the pearl of great price, “her value is far beyond pearls.” “Her husband, entrusting his heart to her, has an unfailing prize. She brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life.” She labors alongside him, “reaches out her hands to the poor,” and he will “give her a reward of her labors, and let her works praise her.” This is a great encouragement for us in his Church, but also a great encouragement for all Christian married couples here.

Justin and Brenna, you are about to enter a new covenant with Christ. In your sacramental marriage, you will encounter each other’s flaws and experience trials, as every married couple will. Do not be surprised when not everything is perfect and do not be alarmed. Maintain your peace. With a love that is patient, a love that is kind, a love that most importantly has its origin and strength in Christ, you will ‘bear all things and endure all things.’ His “love never fails.” Like his Church, which despite the imperfections of her members produces much good fruit, your marriage — if united to Christ — will never fail.

Posted in Catholic Church, Christian Perfection, Faith, Homily, Love, Marriage and Family, St. Paul, Typology, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

Marriage & the Eucharist — The Jonathan Lynch & Abigail Butek Wedding

July 5, 2023

By Fr. Victor Feltes

Johnathan and Abigail, the three readings you chose for your wedding are each about divine love. The First Letter of St. John says “in this is love: not that we have loved God, but that he has loved us and sent his Son as expiation for our sins.” Jesus tells us in St. John’s Gospel, “As the Father loves me, so I love you. …Love one another as I love you.” And the third reading you chose (the first we heard today) comes from The Song of Songs. This Old Testament book is curious in the canon.

The Song of Songs is a collection of sometimes graphic love poetry. Though traditionally attributed to King Solomon, and so sometimes called The Song of Solomon, scholars’ estimates for the year it was written range between 1,000 and 100 BC. And most extraordinarily, the book contains no explicit references to God, or religion, or spirituality. So why is it in the Bible and a fitting source for a Catholic wedding reading?

For starters, The Song of Songs it is not an ode to fornication, for at the center of the book we find a royal wedding procession; the man and woman are husband and wife. And just as Jewish writers saw it as an allegory of God’s love, early Christian saints see it depicting Jesus Christ’s love for us, his Bride, the Church. All four Gospels, two Pauline epistles, and The Book of Revelation call Christ a bridegroom or husband, and Jesus describes himself as such. Therefore, the saints’ view of The Song of Songs is not an outrageous reading but a natural interpretation.

Johnathan and Abigail, you have fittingly chosen to enter marriage today in a wedding Mass. Though getting married in a simple Catholic ceremony is an option, being married at a Holy Mass is best. Like the titles “King of Kings” or “Lord of Lords,” the title of The Song of Songs proclaims it as the most excellent or greatest of songs. In the same way, the Holy Mass may be called the meal of meals, our prayer of prayers, the sacrifice of sacrifices, the covenant of covenants. “Blessed are those called to the supper of the Lamb.”

Today, I wish to highlight for you a few parallels found in the sacraments of marriage and the Eucharist. First, both sacraments establish covenants. The covenantal nature of the Eucharist is made clear at the Last Supper when Jesus offers us his Blood in the chalice. “Take this, all of you, and drink from it,” this is “the Blood of the new and eternal covenant, which will be poured out for you…” Marriage is likewise a covenantal union between bridegroom and bride.

Second, both marriage and the Eucharist are effected by words and action. With the priest’s words of consecration, you have the Real Presence of Jesus on the altar at Mass. With your exchange of vows, you will be married before God’s altar. But that is not the consummation of these sacraments. If neither priest nor people consumed Communion after the consecration, an aspect of the sacrament would remain unfulfilled. Both of these holy sacraments are effected by words and action.

Third, these covenantal unions are ongoingly renewed. Much is made of the day of First Communion and one’s wedding day. These firsts are worthy of celebration, but they are just the beginnings. Through the mutual gifting of one’s whole self to the other, these sacraments are renewed through repetition. Jesus tells us at every Mass, “Take this… this is my Body,” and we are called to offer our whole selves to him in return. Many Catholic couples have placed a crucifix above their headboard reflecting the sacrificial self-giving each spouse is called to. These two sacraments reflect and reveal each other; husband and wife, Christ and his Church. “Love one another as I love you… Do this in memory of me.”

Before receiving Jesus in the Eucharist, we proclaim: “Lord, I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof…” Jonathan, Abigail, and all married spouses, maintain your reverence towards each other. Like approaching Jesus in the Eucharist, do not take each other for granted.

Before receiving him in the Eucharist, we also declare to Jesus: “Only say the word and my soul shall be healed.” Jonathan and Abigail, realize the power of your words for each other. They can wound and they can heal; you too can strengthen and transform each other through the power of your words.

And finally, Jonathan and Abigail, always remain close to Jesus and do his will. He tells us, “If you keep my commandments, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and remain in his love.” As the Song of Song tells us, “As stern as death is [his] love, relentless as the nether-world is [his] devotion; its flames are a blazing [divine] fire. Deep waters cannot quench [his] love, nor floods sweep it away.” Remain in his mighty love and your love will fruitfully endure.

Posted in Homily, Love, Marriage and Family, Mass, Real Presence, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

The Loving Communion of Persons — The Larry Feltes & Shirley Conibear Wedding

February 19, 2023

By Fr. Victor Feltes

For the story of humanity, God began with a single couple, Adam and Eve; a single family, the family of Abraham; a single people, the twelve tribes of Jacob; a single nation, the nation of Israel; and ultimately a single Church, a Church for all peoples and lands, the Church of Jesus Christ. Notice the trend of God creating a wider and wider circle of relationship.

This growth is all detailed in the Bible. God began with two in the Garden of Eden, later a family of seventy journeyed into Egypt, generations later hundreds of thousands came out of Egypt in the Exodus, until there was up to millions at the birth of the Church. These events are all recounted through personal stories, about people such as Joseph, Moses, Jesus and Mary and his friends, the Apostles. This was necessary for God’s purpose. Perhaps an angel could be engaged by a long list of statistics and historical dates, But human persons require personal stories of personal experience to come to know God.

God desires us to know him better. In the time of Moses, God commanded his people to worship no other gods. In the time of the prophets, God clarified for his people that there are no other gods. But in the coming of Jesus, God revealed for all people that God is a communion of Persons. Our God is not a solitary oneness but a unity of three, an eternally loving and blessed Trinity.

So why did God create us? Did he need us to do something for him? Was he incomplete without us? No, we are not the result of necessity. God is complete in himself, but his fullness overflows. Love likes to share. Our creation, our existence, is a gratuitous gift. And God desires and delights that we would be in personal relationship with him and in close personal relationship with one another through him.

Larry and Shirley, you are about to enter a holy covenant together. In a moment, you will exchange vows to be married, and we are all here to support you. But hypothetically, could you both survive without marrying each other? Sure. Could you survive without music, or sweet foods, or sunsets? Of course! You marry today not by compulsion, nor from necessity, but freely and overflowing delight. You both desire to be a blessing to each other; to be the blessing that a wife can be to her husband and the blessing that a husband can be to his wife in this holy communion of persons. He desires for you to have holy joys in life, to support each other through the inevitable trials ahead, and to sanctify each other, to grow each other as saints for Heaven with God.

Larry and Shirley, you both know that wedding days are full of many memories, but from this homily I hope you will remember this: at quiet times in days ahead reflect and see how Jesus has walked with you, leading you to this moment. And as you go forward together in marriage, grow in love with him. You, like all of us here, are created in love, made for love, and called to more perfect love, together with our Lord.

Posted in Holy Trinity, Homily, Marriage and Family, Salvation History, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

Valuable Lessons for Life — The Craig & Debbie Zwiefelhofer Wedding

June 22, 2021

Ring Heart Shadow on Bible

Craig and Debbie, today you are here in this beautiful church to freely give yourselves to each other in marriage. Christ’s Church has discerned and affirms that you are both free to marry, and we gather together to celebrate this day with you. The excellent Scripture readings that you selected, and which we all just heard, contain valuable lessons for life. May their inspired insights bless your marriage and every household which takes them to heart.

In our first reading, on their wedding night, Tobiah arises from bed and says to his wife, “Sister, get up. Let’s pray…” Sarah gets up and they start to pray, praising and thanking God, and asking for his help and blessings. And they conclude, saying together, “Amen, amen.” There are couples who have shared a bed for decades who have never shared their prayers like this. They may go to church on Sunday or pray before meals—and that’s great—but sharing prayer as a couple like this is a greater intimacy. You do not need to be eloquent. You can even pray together silently. On a regular basis, offer two or three personal things for your spouse to pray about for you, and ask your spouse to share two or three things you can pray about to God for them. You can pray silently for each other for even just a minute or two and simply wrap up with an Our Father and Hail Mary.

A couple that prays together, and for each other, will be more perfectly one. A life of prayer is also a cure for our anxieties and fears. St. Paul reminds us in our second reading, “The Lord is near.” Therefore, he writes:

“Have no anxiety at all, but in everything,
  by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
  make your requests known to God.
  Then the peace of God
  that surpasses all understanding
  will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

The world and my problems may be bigger than me, but God is bigger than them both. Pray often and God’s peace, even without your fully understanding what he is doing, will secure and calm your hearts and minds. St. Paul then goes on to teach the Philippians and us another lesson:

“[B]rothers and sisters,
  whatever is true, whatever is honorable,
  whatever is just, whatever is pure,
  whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious,
  if there is any excellence
  and if there is anything worthy of praise,
  think about these things.”

If you ask someone, “How you doing?” and they say, “I can’t complain,” they don’t mean it literally. Everybody can complain. Things to complain about are all around us. Even good things can be complained about for not being better. Anybody can complain because complaining is easy. But to focus on what is lovely, excellent, and praiseworthy is a choice. Highlighting the good in your everyday life will nurture peace within you, peace between you, and peace around you. Finally, we come to Jesus’ words in our Gospel. Jesus tells his disciples:

“This is my commandment:
  love one another as I love you.
  No one has greater love than this,
  to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”

Ahead of you are good times and trials, both joys and sufferings, Mount Tabors and Mount Calvarys. Choose to love through them all and your Good Fridays will lead to Easter Sundays. In conclusion, pray together, focus on what is good, and choose to love like Jesus loves you and you will be blessed.

Posted in Christian Perfection, Devotions, Gratitude, Homily, Marriage and Family, Prayer, Sacrifice, Tobiah and Sarah, Wedding Homilies | 1 Comment »

Hearts Like His — The Nathan & Cassandra Hagenbrock Wedding

June 12, 2021

Solemnity of the Most Sacred Heart of Jesus

Sacred Heart of JesusNathan and Cassie’s wedding day lands upon this, the third Friday after the Feast of Pentecost, the eleventh day of June. God’s providence has arranged it that they be married on this special day – a feast day, the Solemnity of the Sacred Heart of Jesus, during a month especially dedicated to Jesus’ Sacred Heart. You can see depictions of the Sacred Heart inside this church. There is the statue of Jesus behind me, here in the sanctuary, and presently another statue in our devotional corner in the back. In artistic depictions, you may see Jesus’ Sacred Heart resting upon his chest, or maybe he holds it in his hand offering it to you, and sometimes his heart is depicted by all itself. In every depiction it is a human heart, crowned with thorns, pierced on the side, with flames and a cross emerging from the top. What is the meaning of these things? What do they reveal about Jesus? And what do they mean for Nathan and Cassie and us?

The heart is the organ within every human being which is most associated symbolically with emotion, devotion, and love. Since becoming man through his Incarnation two thousand years ago, the Eternal Son of God, Jesus Christ, has possessed a literal human heart in himself. And Jesus has personally experienced human feelings as well. But Jesus and his heart are not merely human, but divine. This reality is symbolized by the flames. As at the burning bush in Exodus, these flames do not consume his heart, but coexist with it and glorify it. Jesus feels and loves with a divine intensity, and this love leads him to sacrifice for love. This love gives rise to the Cross, upon which he suffered for us. This love occasions the crown of thorns, which he wore for us. And this love led to Jesus’ heart being pierced, the event we hear about in today’s Gospel. Jesus’ Sacred Heart is human and compassionate, divine and loving, long-suffering and glorious. And it is the will of Jesus, meek and humble of heart, to make our hearts like unto his, that you may endure suffering, be loving, and be made glorious.

You can see that this world is broken. Other people are broken. And you know, Nathan and Cassie, that though there is a great deal to like about you both, neither of you is yet perfect. Know that in your marriage, you will inevitably encounter suffering; sufferings caused by the world, sufferings caused by other people, and sometimes sufferings caused by each other. But when these thorns and small cuts come, do not let the fire of your love go out. Choose to keep loving, willing the good of each other. This is how Jesus loves us, and how he calls us to love.

This persistent decision to love is essential, but it is not enough. To love beyond human strength requires God’s strength; divine fire burning in your heart. You must love with Jesus’ love by connecting with him; praying daily, worshipping weekly, and communing with him constantly (spiritually or sacramentally) as you are able. Love each other by the love with which he loves you.

Choosing to love with the love of Christ in marriage is now your calling. This vocation together is to be for your joy, fruitfulness, and glory in the likeness of Christ. May Jesus Christ make your our hearts like unto his Sacred Heart, so that you may endure suffering, be loving, and be made glorious, like Jesus Christ himself.

Posted in Christian Perfection, Feast Day Homilies, Homily, Jesus Christ, Love, Marriage and Family, Passion, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

Christ the Bridegroom and His Bride — The John and Megan Salm Wedding

February 13, 2021

When Jesus saw the crowds, he went up the mountain. He sat down and his disciples came to Him. Jesus began to teach them, and his first teachings in this Sermon on the Mount were the Beatitudes we just heard. Blessed are the poor in spirit, the mourners, the meek, the merciful, the pure of heart, the peacemakers, those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, those who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness. What do these things mean? How can we best understand them? Who best models these blessed paths for us to follow? Realize that Jesus’ Beatitudes are autobiographical. These Beatitudes describe Jesus himself.

Jesus is poor in spirit, relying upon his Father-God, and personally connecting with him every day through prayer. Jesus mourns because he loves and cares about us, our brokenness, our pains, our sorrows. Jesus is meek, not coming as a warrior on a warhorse imposing his will by force, but rather–for instance–entering Jerusalem humbly on a donkey, inviting the world and all people to freely accept his Kingdom and himself. Jesus is merciful, he forgives us because he loves us. Jesus is pure of heart, he loves with pure motives and true devotion. Jesus is the peacemaker whose peace is true peace. More than bread alone, Jesus hungers and thirsts for righteousness. And because of this, he is persecuted for the sake of righteousness, and blesses many through his self-sacrifice.

Jesus went up the mountain and his disciples came to him. There are many crowds in this world, but Jesus’ disciples, his Church, they come to him. And Jesus teaches us to imitate his own example. The saints give us excellent examples of how to be Christlike. As St. Paul tells the Corinthians, “Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ.” Get to know saints, those alive on earth and those alive in Heaven, and you’ll become holier, growing ever closer to the best version of yourself through their friendship. John and Megan, be saintly friends for each other to help each other, and your children, be saints. And meditate upon the relationship of Christ and his Church to guide you in your marriage.

Recall that Jesus calls himself the Bridegroom and his Church is called his Bride. Now every Christian is called to imitate Jesus Christ, and every Christian soul is spiritually his Bride. But just like the Holy Eucharist we celebrate today is not just a symbol or a memory of Jesus but his Real Presence among us, so the Christian Sacrament of Marriage you are about to enter makes present the mystical marriage of Jesus Christ and his Church between you and within you. John, love your wife, even as Christ loved the church, handing himself over for her, to bless and sanctify her. Megan, love and follow your husband, becoming fruitful and holier together with him.

Pray as a couple, with your kids, and individually on your own, stay close to the Lord’s Sacraments in his Church, relying on God to enrich your spirits, personally connecting with God every day. Have compassion for each other, mourning each others’ trials and consoling each other through them. Be meek toward each other, leading or following as is proper, but always inviting rather than imposing. Be merciful, forgiving each others’ faults in love. Be pure of heart, devoted to each other with pure motives. Be peacemakers, not merely content with an absence of conflict, but cultivating true harmony together. And be not content with just the pursuit of daily bread but hunger and thirst for righteousness, and be willing to suffer for righteousness, that your lives may be a blessing to many.

John and Megan, we are happy for you, we are excited for you, and we anticipate great things from the two of you together. May our Lord Jesus Christ, who has begun his good work in you, bring it to fulfillment.

Posted in Chrisitian Virtues, Christian Perfection, Homily, Jesus Christ, Marriage and Family, Sermon on the Mount, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

Your Special Day: August 24th — The Aaron & Ciera Logslett Wedding

August 24, 2019

Aaron and Ciera, this date, August 24th, August 24th 2019, is a date you will remember (or else you will be reminded of) every year for the rest of your lives together. Today marks the beginning of your marriage covenant. This will henceforth be your special day. But are you aware of the past history of this date? Momentous things have occurred on August 24th.

1,940 years ago today, on August 24th, 79 A.D., an Italian volcano, Mount Vesuvius, famously erupted, killing thousands of people in the Roman city of Pompeii a moment. That’s why you picked today for your wedding date, right?

On August 24th, 1814, 205 years ago today, during the War of 1812, the British army invaded Washington D.C. and set fire to the White House. The President and First Lady, James and Dolly Madison escaped, but they lost their home and many personal possessions. But, it’s not only unfortunate historical events that mark this day. Positive things have happened as well.

110 years ago today, In 1909, the first of some 2 million cubic yards of concrete began to pour to create the Panama Canal. This project, connecting two oceans through Central America, is one of our country’s greatest engineering feats.

And 70 years ago today, on August 24th, 1949, the North Atlantic Treaty Organization went into effect. The United States led Western nations in forming this mutual defense pact (called NATO) against the evil and hostile Soviet Union. Through this alliance, the U.S. and her allies would go on to win the Cold War.

Besides being interesting trivia, I mention these events from the past because they carry lessons for your future together.

This is a happy day, a day for great joy, but it is my duty to tell you, and my desire to help you, to enter the years ahead with open eyes. There will be enemies to your marriage. Hostile forces will attack your house that would burn it down. I speak of temptations and dangers from this broken world around us, your own weak flesh, and the very real devil. All of us must fight these battles. And there will be days in your marriage when unexpected disasters fall from the sky, crises and trials will erupt in your lives in ways you cannot now predict. I know this because the Cross comes to every person’s life.

But today, the two of you are entering into a new alliance, to stand and endure against these evils. It’s an alliance sealed with God and with each other; to be a good wife and mother like Sirach praises in our first reading, and a kind and merciful husband and father like our Psalm celebrates. Together, you can and will prevail. Today the cement of your marriage covenant will be poured and hardened. Today you have found your life’s calling, your vocation. Rather than taking a longer way around to this world to Heaven, your marriage is to be your straight path to holiness. Your marriage is to be your channel of God’s grace.

As St. Paul’s prayed for the Romans in our second reading, so we pray for you:

“May the God of endurance and encouragement
grant you to think in harmony with one another,
in keeping with Christ Jesus,
that with one accord you may with one voice
glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Today, Jesus preaches his Gospel message to you

“As the Father loves me, so I also love you.
Remain in my love.
If you keep my commandments,
you will remain in my love…
I have told you this so that my joy may be in you
and your joy may be complete.
This is my commandment:
love one another as I love you.”

Aaron and Ciera, remember these things in the marriage you are about to enter so that you may be blessed in this life and forever. Now, let’s make history.

Posted in Homily, Marriage and Family, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

United Hearts — The Kristopher and KayLee Schnitzler Wedding

July 4, 2011

Kristopher and KayLee, when you chose this day, July 2nd, to be your wedding day you were probably not aware that you were choosing an extra special date. We unite your hearts today in holy matrimony amidst Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Immaculate Heart of Mary. Yesterday was the Solemnity of His Sacred Heart and today is the Memorial of her Immaculate Heart. We celebrate these two feasts so closely on the calendar, one after the other, because no two human hearts are so intimately united in a perfect love. I present them to you as role models for your love

Mary and Jesus were mother and Son. They were never married in the way we think of marriage, so how can they be role models for your marriage? In Jesus and Mary, we see the perfect man with the perfect woman, we see the New Adam together with the New Eve, we see the King and Queen of Heaven and Earth. Jesus is the Bridegroom and Mary is the flawless image of the Church, which is His Bride. By seeing how Jesus loves her and how Mary loves Him we can learn much about how men and women are to serve and love each other.

How does Jesus love Mary? For one thing, he listens to her. He is receptive to her wants and needs. It was true at the wedding feast of Cana, He worked a miracle to provide wine at her request, and it is still true now in heaven, where she continues to ask for good things for us. A good husband must be receptive to his wife’s wants and needs. On the other hand, in what manner do you think Mary asks things of Jesus? Mary does not nag Jesus, asking Him in plaintive tones. She doesn’t sit next to Jesus in Heaven and sigh, “I see you still haven’t taken care of the garbage down there.” Instead, I imagine she says to Him, “It would make me very happy if you would do this for me.” A good wife must allow pleasing her to be her husband’s joy, not his burden.

A good husband must die to himself in many ways for his family, and a good wife must support him through his sacrifices. Look how Jesus goes to the cross and offers Himself for the good of Mary and her children. He suffers for her and lays down his life for her. And how does Mary support Him? She is right there, at the foot of the cross, faithful and consoling. God gave Eve to Adam as a partner, to support him in the garden. Mary continues to be a helpmate to Jesus in His work of harvesting the vineyard of this world. A good husband lays down his life for his wife and a good wife must support him through his sacrifices.

From the cross, Jesus make Mary the mother of all Christians. He desired Mary to be the mother of many children, and now, Mary’s motherhood is perhaps her greatest joy. A good husband and wife must be open to children. This is the will of God for you and He will bless you with joy for saying “Yes” to Him.

The worship of God and following His will was at the center of the relationship between Jesus and Mary. Every Sabbath they came to join the worship at the synagogue (the Church of their day) and every day they said prayers and remained close to God. So too, God must be at the center of every good marriage. You must come to Mass every Sunday and pray every day. Good husbands and wives share the same mission in life, to assist each other and their children in getting to Heaven.

From earth to Heaven, Jesus led Mary through life with love, and Mary faithfully followed Him. A good husband must have the integrity not to phone it in, but to lead, and a good wife must have the courage to follow that lead. Kristopher and KayLee, May the hearts of Jesus and Mary reign in your homes. May you model their virtues on earth. And may you draw each other, and your children, to share their heavenly joy forever.

Posted in Adam and Eve, Blessed Virgin Mary, Chrisitian Virtues, Christian Perfection, Homily, Jesus Christ, Marriage and Family, St. John the Baptist Parish, Typology, Wedding Homilies | Leave a Comment »

Two Becoming One — The Ann and Larry Feltes Wedding

January 12, 2011


Has the institution of marriage now passed its time? More and more people are not getting married at all. Has the time for marriage passed? Is marriage good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled under foot? No. Marriage is not old-fashioned, it is from the beginning. Marriage is not customary, it is foundational. Marriage, the sacrament of marriage, is needed today more than ever. The world looks around and wonders… “Can promises really be kept for life? Is self-less love really sustainable?” Yes. By the power of this sacrament, which Larry and Ann will henceforth be able to call upon whenever they have need.

What is the source of this sacrament’s power? Jesus, on the night before He gave His life for us, took bread and wine and said, ‘This is my body and blood, this is my very self. I give myself to you, lay myself down for you, and offer you a covenant. I love you, I want to bless you, and I want us to be one.’ Finally, He said, “Do this in memory of me.” This is what husbands and wives do in the sacrament of marriage.

Sacraments make present the realities they signify. The sacrament of marriage is not merely like the love shared between Christ and His Church, the sacrament really makes this mystery present. In your marriage, you can draw upon the love of Christ for His bride and upon the love of the saints for the Bridegroom. Stay close to the Eucharist, continue to pray together every day (as you do now,) and you will embody this mystery clearly for all to see.

On this day, it is natural for us to think of Jim and Mary; and it is right that we do so, for no one puts bushel baskets over shinning lamps. Mary and Jim are irreplaceable, and we would not try to replace them. Today, Ann and Larry enter this sacrament so that they may continue to enjoy and be blessed by the great goods contained in marriage. There may be challenges in melding two families together, but God’s grace will level any bumps on the path, and help the two become one. Every year, Ann writes a Christmas letter to her grandchildren. This Christmas she told them that this year would be special because they would be getting “a bonus grandpa.” Today I feel that I am receiving a “bonus aunt.”

When I asked Ann what she liked about Larry she said, “He’s a good man.” Later, when I asked Larry what he liked about Ann he said (and I paraphrase,) “In summary, in preponderance of all the evidence, and in conclusion… she’s a good woman.” Larry and Ann, because your marriage will be built on this powerful sacrament, with a shared mission (focused on God, family and the work of love,) I trust that people will see your good marriage, and glorify our heavenly Father, for many happy years to come.

Posted in Culture, Homily, Jesus Christ, Marriage and Family, Salt and Light, Wedding Homilies | 1 Comment »

The Great Marriage — The Nick and Laurel White Wedding

October 9, 2010

In the Gospel we just heard Jesus say that “from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female,” and “for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” Jesus is quoting here from Genesis, but something about these words has always struck me as a little strange. Why did Jesus and Genesis mention that ‘a man shall leave his father and mother to be joined to his wife?”

We tend to think of the bride as leaving her family to join her husband. Traditionally, as we saw today, her father walks her down the aisle to give her away, and the bride changes her name to match her husband’s. Perhaps it was put this way (“a man shall leave his father and mother”) because for the man must go out in pursuit of his bride. If a woman in a relationship found out that her man was leaving it to her to pursue him she would be very disappointed.

There is, I think, another important reason for the choice of these words: these words speak of Christ. Jesus left His eternal Father’s house in Heaven to become a man, and then He departed His perfect mother’s house to begin His ministry, all in pursuit of winning a bride, His bride the Church. Jesus is the man who left His father and His mother to be joined to his wife.

From the beginning of creation, God had made us male and female. So when the Lord sought to be perfectly united with us, Christ became a human being. Jesus became one flesh with our humanity, so that we could become one with His divinity. He came as a man because a man, like God, pursues his beloved. He comes to us as a man in love, not out of lust, not to dominate us or for His own selfish pleasure, but for a noble purpose. Jesus comes to propose to us and to enter into a marriage between Heaven and Earth, between God and man, between Himself and His bride, the Church.

Nick and Laurel, the sacrament you are about to enter, the sacrament of marriage, connects you to this union between Christ and the Church. Don’t try to rely on you own resources alone, but connect to the power of your sacrament. Nick, ask Jesus to let you share the love He has for His bride. Then, empowered by this love, you will lay down your life for your bride, and cherish her and bless her as long as you both shall live. Laurel, ask Mary and the saints, to let you share the love they have for the Bridegroom. Then, empowered by this love, you will rejoice in your husband, and honor him and follow him as long as you both shall live. Remember, this sacrament you are about to enter is not merely a symbol the of love between Christ and His bride. It makes that love truly present in you.

Posted in Homily, Jesus Christ, Love, Marriage and Family, St. John the Baptist Parish, Wedding Homilies | 1 Comment »

For an Extraordinary Marriage — Wedding of Andrew and Laura Foreki

March 3, 2010

I would like to begin this homily today by sharing with you the extraordinary story of how this boy, Andrew, met this girl, Laura. Picture Andrew, walking one morning across the University of Wisconsin campus in the deep cold of winter. He is on his way to Chadborn Hall where a prayer group is meeting for their twice-weekly 7:30 rosary. 

He walks into the room where the group is meeting and casts his eyes, for the very first time, upon a drowsy-eyed coed named Laura. And can you guess what Andrew said to himself when his eyes saw Laura for the very first time? That’s right. He said to himself, “Oh, I don’t know who that is.” This reaction, of course, is to be expected, since Andrew and Laura didn’t know each other prior to being introduced a few moments later.

Now Andrew’s first impression is not what makes this an extraordinary story. Did you notice what was the extra-ordinary part? Here it is: Here we have two college students, getting up, out of warm beds, on a cold day, to pray a rosary, at 7:30 in the morning! Now, you have to understand, in College Student Time, this is like getting up at 4:30 AM. Your typical college student doesn’t get up any earlier than he has to, but these two got up… to pray. For this and a thousand other reasons, I think you will all agree with me, that we have here two extra-ordinary people, from whom we good reason to expect an extraordinary marriage.

Do you two want to ensure you share an extraordinary marriage together? Then there are three things that I, as an ordained servant of Jesus Christ, believe that you should do.

First, like Tobit and his wife Sarah in our first reading, you should pray together. Of course you must pray individually. And of course you must pray with your children once they come. But you also need to pray together. It doesn’t need to be anything complicated.  Just hold each others’ hands a few moments before you part for work, or stand, or kneel, at your bedside, like Tobit and Sarah did, and speak aloud from your hearts to God. Ask blessings for each other, and give thanks for all the blessing you have received, and close you prayer by saying, “Amen, amen.”

Some couples find this kind of prayer too intimidating, or too personal, to be attempted; for our prayers express our most intimate selves, our fears, our hopes, our pains, our joys, our deepest longings. If you pray honestly in this way, nothing will be hidden between you. Today you will vow to give yourselves completely to each other. Do you want to be truly and totally one? Then pray together. Through marriage you will share of one flesh, if but pray together and you will also share of one spirit. Pray together and you will share an extraordinary marriage as one flesh with one soul. So please, pray together.

The second thing you should do for an extraordinary marriage is to come to Mass. Come to Mass every Sunday and every holy day of obligation. Come, and be moved by the beauty of architecture and songs. Come, and be strengthened by the experience of Christian fellowship. Come, and be inspired by the eloquence of Gospel preaching.

No doubt some people hear this and think to themselves, “That sounds great… But our church is ugly and the songs are dumb and hard to sing. And our community is little more than a gathering of strangers. And our priest always gives the same boring homilies.” Which all boils down to saying, I just don’t get anything out of going to Mass. Then hear this, even if everything else is lacking at Mass, Jesus Christ is always here for us, Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity in the Eucharist. At Mass, the one sacrifice of Calvary and the Last Supper are made truly present to us for us to receive their power.

At Mass Jesus Christ shows us the perfect spousal love that He calls each of us to imitate. Jesus never called himself “the bachelor.” No, He joyfully called himself “the bridegroom” and eagerly seeks to unite himself to His bride. On the cross, naked without shame, He consummates this union with her, giving himself freely, fully, fruitfully, and forever… freely, fully, fruitfully, and forever. Do you want your union with each other to be free, fully, fruitful, and forever? Then come to Mass to learn the pattern of how Christ loves us and draw from the power He offers us through communion with Him. His is the pattern and the power for an extraordinary marriage. So please, come to Mass.

The third and final thing you should do for an extraordinary marriage is to be salt and light in the world. What does this mean? Being salt and light means that your Christianity should show. As Jesus says, “Your light must shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your heavenly Father.”

Your good deeds should stand out in the world. As St. Paul says in the second reading, “Do not conform yourselves to this age, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind” If the world never judges you to be radical in any aspect of your Christian life, then you’re not doing it right. Then you’re not yet living as salt and light–you’re not yet living like the saints. For example, everyone loves their friends, but who loves their enemies and prayers for them? Most people pray, but who spends a long time to be with God every day. Many people can give when times are prosperous, but who gives generously when times are tight? Such things as this are what it means to be the light and the salt of the world. Light is different than the darkness, and salt makes the ordinary flavorful.

Clearly, you two are salt and light already, for who goes on weekend retreats to know God better? Or who drives to Washington D.C. to march for life? Or who goes down to Louisiana to volunteer for Hurricane relief? Or who get up at 7:30 in the morning to pray the Rosary? So, please keep on being salt and light, and your marriage will be extraordinary.

Years from now, I don’t expect that you will remember much from this homily, but I hope you remember these three things: Pray together, come to Mass, and be salt and light and you will have an extraordinary marriage.

[Preached as a deacon for my sister’s wedding,  November 22, 2008]

Posted in Homily, Marriage and Family, Mass, Prayer, Real Presence, Salt and Light, Tobiah and Sarah, Wedding Homilies, Witness | 1 Comment »